


Day 4 - Caged

by Accal1a



Series: Whumptober 2020 [4]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Torture, Introspection, M/M, Missing Scene, Prison, Season/Series 02, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:22:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26904331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Accal1a/pseuds/Accal1a
Summary: Magnus thought he'd had enough hurt in his life...until he was betrayed by the one man he thought he could trust above all others.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Series: Whumptober 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1949002
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14
Collections: Whumptober 2020





	Day 4 - Caged

**Author's Note:**

> No 4. RUNNING OUT OF TIME  
>  **Caged** ~~| Buried Alive | Collapsed Building~~  
> 

For a moment all he could feel was pain.

Later on, he would wonder where there was anything he could have done in that moment to have stopped what occurred, but at the time there was nothing. There was only pain and the bone-deep confusion of where it had come from.

The hateful looks across his friend's faces were the next thing he was aware of, and he couldn't fathom why that could be. Sure, he had failed to contain the demon, and they could have achieved more from the act, but that should be a look of mild annoyance at best, a look of resolve that this was another thing that they needed to deal with, not this vitriol. It didn't make any sense.

When he realised what had happened his heart jolted in his chest. No. The demon couldn't have done that…could they?

His defence fell on deaf ears when he tried to explain who he actually was, and he _hated_ that he was so hurt by it. If it had been the other way around, he wasn't sure he would have believed himself either. After all the things that Valentine had pulled, after all the tricks, all the lies, this probably sounded like yet more, and he found that he couldn't even be annoyed with that.

He just felt desperately sad and alone.

By the time he was thrown in a cell, he started to become resigned to his fate, even as he frantically tried to produce ways that he could get free, clear his name, and chalk this up to a bad day and nothing more. Even with hope, he knew that it would take a monumental effort to get the Shadowhunters to see reason.

Why would they believe him after all?

He futilely tried to call his magic, hoping that with his consciousness transferred to another body, the magic, so inherent to his being, would be as well…but there was nothing there. Reaching for it felt like tripping, as if he had hit an obstacle and was in freefall. There was nothing there but a gaping hole where it should be, and it made him feel sick. He could barely remember a time without his magic, and he didn't want to dwell on the moment that was burned into his soul when he had lashed out as a boy.

Standing there, caged like an animal, like so many Downworlders before him, he waited.

After a while he started to shout, started to plead, calling for his Alexander, hoping against hope that somehow, their souls would just know each other, no matter the bodies they were in. That Alec would be able to take one look at him, really look into his eyes and just _see_ him as him. Lilith, he hoped that was true.

He had a brief and hysterical moment when he considered praying to Asmodeus, which he shook off literally and mentally when the thought came to mind. He couldn't crack now, not when there was a chance, a slight sliver of a chance that someone would believe him, that Alexander would—

When his boyfriend wrenched open the door to the cell, his heart leapt. Now they would solve this, they'd work out what magic the demon had used on both him and Valentine, they'd fix it, and he would be back to normal. He didn't know precisely how they would do so, but he knew that with Alexander and his friends by his side he would be able to do anything.

That was until he saw the look in Alec's eyes, the hard and sinister look that he had seen shown to enemies and those who would do him and his family harm. It was not a look that he ever thought he would see directed his way.

He started to talk. He had to _try_ to make Alec see reason. He couldn't just stay here and do nothing…but even the words he used fell on deaf ears. The more he told Alec, the more he tried to get him to see reason, the angrier his boyfriend became. He tried saying things that only he would know, so that Alec would _know_ that it was him and not Valentine, so that Alec could stop this before it went any further.

His words went unheeded.

Soon, he found himself strapped to a chair, knowing that absolutely nothing good could come of his time there, but not knowing to begin with quite how bad it was going to be. Still, he shouted for his love, still he struggled, hoped, and prayed that he would be rescued from this nightmare.

Alec entering the room finally quieted him, until he took a gag and fastened it across his mouth. Then he knew that it was all for nought. If Alec had forsaken him then he was a dead man. No amount of wishing otherwise would make it true.

As soon as Imogen drew the rune on his skin, he could feel a rising wave of physical pain, but that was pain he could deal with, he had had a lot of pain in his life. He thought he could weather this as well.

That was, until the memories started.

Then, he was reduced to nothing more than one other screaming prisoner the Clave had tortured. He was added to the long line of people who had been both innocent and guilty who had suffered at their hands.

It was at once both a lonely and a comforting thought.

After an infinity and yet somehow also a second later, when Alec finally seemed to realise what had happened, and ran in to rescue him, it didn't seem real. He could barely remember being removed from the chair, from the cell, could barely remember being supported home. Alec's hands felt alien to him now, hands that had tied him down and allowed this atrocity to happen, hands that were complicit in his ordeal. If he could have stood on his own, he would have shrugged him off. If he was able to speak more than a few words at a time, he would have told him to leave. He didn't want that support now, not after what he had done.

Somehow, he managed to push those thoughts deep down, compartmentalise in such a way that he was able to fashion a spell to reverse the effects of the body swap. He would never know how those broken pieces were able to hold together for long enough that he could do so, he was just grateful that he managed it.

Being back in his own skin felt foreign to him as well, even though that was all he had wanted for the last however long it had been since he had been removed from his body. He wanted a third option, wanted to hide away, take stock, build up his defences again, learn how to face the world…but that wasn't something he would have.

So instead he had a body that didn't fit right, a boyfriend who didn't trust him, and the memories of a shredded man.

After it was all over, he sat.

He sat almost perfectly still, silently, and found he could barely even do that. All he could see on an endless loop was the horrors of his life, brought forth by the Agony rune, and the realisation that it was Alec's people who had hurt both him and countless others was heart-breaking.

He was no longer physically caged, and no longer caged within his own mind, but that didn't mean he was free.

**Author's Note:**

> I'd say I'm sorry, but I think we all know I'm only a little bit sorry.
> 
> ~~~
> 
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> 
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